Still slipping...

Dear LORD Jesus,
Sometimes I cannot believe the situations I find myself in. I confess it is hard for me to trust you, even when you have placed me here for this time yourself. When I feel bombarded from all sides, it is hard for me to stand upright. I slip, I trip, I fall. It is so discouraging to be on the ground with a bruised tailbone.
In this place, where my weakness is so visible, you strengthen me. I know it is you. Still I wonder who what where when?! Mostly, when are you coming back, Jesus? I am so easily overwhelmed with the hurt in families, the pain in youth, the violence in nations, the ignorance of people, the greed of others, the sin in me.
You tether me in place, to the anchor of hope. Like riding a rollercoaster on the steepest part: I close my eyes and sink deep into the seat...I wait for it to be over, for you to carry me through.
When I slip, and trip, and fall, sometimes it is best for me to just stay there. Spread my arms out and close my eyes. I don't say a thing, and I don't think of much. These are my best prayers to you right now, Jesus. On the ground; a fallen being. Maybe this Christmas, you will lift me up. I'm waiting for you, Jesus, as I walk cautiously across the ice. I'm waiting for you, staring at the computer screen for hours. I'm waiting for you, Jesus. I know you won't overlook me. Thank you.Amen.