I don't think of myself as a very joyful person...and God convicted me recently to remember I am his child and that it is something to be very very happy and joyful about.Little things have been happening that show me God has planted a deep joy in my heart. One of our teachers brings her dog into the class and whenever I see her(the dog) she runs up to me and licks me and gets all excited, ready to play. My teacher says her dog has a special recognition for my joyful spirit. The Pastor's wife at church said her kids really like me- that I'm a joy magnet. When I get home after school I get so happy to be around David's gentleness and humour. I wish it translated so that I could deeply know and experience it.
It is hard to live in Vancouver. All the things I hear on the bus about bloodletting ceremonies, gay men breaking up marriages to sleep with the man, all my homeless friends I see everyday, and the shameful thought inside my head when I am exhausted; I hope I don't see them today. I cry on my walk home from church nearly every sunday, partly from the relief of seeing families and couples that love eachother, and partly because so much of what I am experiencing here at this point in life is challenging.
I think God will have much to say to me this Christmas about joy.
