Advent

Our friends we had wanted to visit were sick and we were anxious, after two months of travel, to finally be on the road to home. The coquihala highway was closed due to weather conditions, which was our usual route, so we decided to blitz it all the way home in one day taking the southern road.

Almost immediately I could see snow capped mountains from my passenger seat window. After two months of coast and sun, these mountains were an exciting and beautiful sight. The further east we went, the more snow filtered down on to the road and the car. I was getting more and more in the Christmas mood, longing more and more for peace and family and warmth and love.

Our whole trip had been adventurous and amazing. I saw and learnt much. A lot about myself too; things that I am not particularly proud of. Selfishness, short tempered, fearful, greedy, ignorant...Things that are next to impossible for me to change in myself, no matter how hard I try to take a breather moment or walk away. I want so much to be a softer, brighter version of myself. Loud in the right moments, and silent in others. Generous and compassionate. Encouraging and joyful.

The snow was laying thick on the roads now, and the forests lining the highway were an awesome white and green. Living in Vancouver for the past two winters had caused me to forget how much I enjoy the snow and the look of winter in the mountains. Snow, hushing all this muck with a soft white. The grace of snow coverings. Snowflakes were hitting our windshield.

We had to reduce our speed or our non-winter tires would have us slip sliding all over the place...Another reminder that we need to slow down. It will take a little bit longer to get home...Almost there, just be patient...

...And I need to be patient for home; for all the things I wish were different: sex slave trafficking, debt, unrest and workaholics, consumerism and the imbalances of wealth and poverty, broken relationships...

I thought that I was totally done with long car drives, but this snowy scene was energizing me. I felt so at peace in the car, going 50 km an hour, getting to enjoy our surroundings. The snowflakes met us one by one, and strangely, we were at peace.

Not quite there, still waiting for a Savior. Waiting for change. Swirled up in the mystery of God's workings and ways. I've got to say I'm really embracing Advent. I still feel like my travels aren't over. I'm still waiting to go home. I'm still waiting for the surprising glory of God in a baby. I am waiting with much anticipation for God's enormous love to snow-ball me over again, and to change me and renew me and refresh me and center me. Come, Lord Jesus.