I don't really like pickleloaf.

I don't really like pickleloaf...I don't really like blogging. But here I am, blurting out whatever is on my mind.

Monday, June 4, 2012

Zoe life lessons 10


(this picture is funny. Anyways.)

Yesterday was a tough day for me to be grateful and happy. It was totally yucky out, the night before I had run over a girl's dog with our car (Although it was a miracle! The dog was okay!) I was worried about getting a job, and also worried that I was being too worried and not trusting God, and the same old woes about being used for the Kingdom. We were (are) all sick with a bad cough and runny noses. We were tired and weary.
Zoe had been crying and fussing on and off all day, basically unhappy to do anything for too long. I couldn't get myself motivated to sew anything, even though David was here and could technically look after Zoe while I cut out patterns etc. 
Desperate for some rest, I sat down in Zoe's room and nursed her, hoping it would help her get to sleep. As she latched on and off to cry and fuss, I decided to try the "eucharisteo" dare of thanking God, out loud. "Thank you God for Zoe, for her ways of communicating, for her warm body, her cute toes and dog ears..." 
I kid you not, she stopped fussing, not that she needed to in order for me to readjust my attitude. I think David heard me praying, and he came into Zoe 's room and lay on the floor. Zoe wasn't going to sleep, slipped out of my lap and walked over to David. We were all in her room, all pretty defeated by tiredness and sickness and worry about the future/present. It struck me then, how beautiful this was. We continue to stick together, to put worth in family, just being together even when it is yucky or boring. There is an invisible strength in the family unit, a strong woven thread of love that binds us together. God lives in the midst of us and strengthens and encourages us. And He makes me see beauty in small ugly things. He shows me how to appreciate all the great gifts He gives to me, especially a family. A daughter who lives and breathes and laughs and gets sick and heals. A Husband who tries and works and plays and dreams and stands by me, even with no certainty for the future. 
Not every day can be productive, exciting, super happy. But every day can be a place to see God's gifts, to hold my family and to say, "Thank you". 

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Beautiful. Absolutely beautiful.

Lynne said...

I understand the stress and the worry about not knowing if or how your being used for the Kingdom. But I'd like to encourage you Elli in that when you share in this blog you definitely encourage me and remind me of the things Jesus is doing in my own life.
Keep the Word planted in your heart Elli! Eat it daily. Make room for peace. Things are going to be ok. God has a plan, for you, David, Zoe, and your family as a unit.
I hope you three feel better soon, and that where you need peace and reassurance of God's love you'll be given it in abundance!
(I'm still trying to get Andrew to take days off...He may not be able to coordinate it because of some work issues, so I may do a bit of traveling on my own. I'm coming to visit no matter what!)

Aimee said...

tears came reading this post, imagining you three intricately created and beautiful people experiencing God's gift of family and his presence.

and that photo made me even more excited for seeing you guys pretty soon!